Inside-outside; optimism-pessimism; half-full-half-empty. There’s a spiral of thoughts here in Rosemary’s Exploration to digest. And somehow the article this week points directly at me!
I’ve been an optimist all my life. And I live a reasonably healthy internal life and do look for confirming signs all around me. And then I went to the doctor last week.
It’s funny Rosemary should use the example: “You might have been given a medical diagnosis that you don’t like.” My doctor visit, the first in several years, was just routine; I thought I should get a new base-line of all the numbers western medicine is so fond of analyzing. I feel in excellent health, eating well on a pretty strict regimen of raw nut, seed, fruit and vegetable smoothies for breakfast and lunch, exercising with yoga and qigong, meditating, working for myself and a pretty gentle boss (Rosemary); all good things right? So, the nurse took my blood pressure and seemed pretty alarmed; “all the celery in your smoothies doesn’t seem to be working” she remarked.
OK, I’ve had an issue with high blood pressure before; it’s a genetic condition. I have taken medication in the past but then controlled it reasonably well with Chinese herbs, acupuncture, etc. I thought I was good to go for life! Not so! The external sign here is a warning that things need to change even more.
And I am resisting this change; my resistance is not improving my blood pressure a bit! I am ignoring the external signs, but struggling to change the internal perspective in order to see the external signs change. While I remain an optimist my glass seems to be closer to empty than full! Am I fooling myself?
Since my experience at Qi Revolution with Jeff Primack I have been practicing his Level 1 Qigong Form every day. I am getting prepared for Level 1 training this Saturday. And I am planning to go for certification to teach Level 1 a week later on March 9th. I am optimistic that I can achieve this goal. I am changing my diet to include many of Jeff’s recommendations in his Conquering Any Disease book, following many of his suggestions for reducing high blood pressure (yep, more celery!) and curing heart disease. More internal changes.
Now, I realize this is a life-change and not an over-night change that I’m working on here. It’s only been a week since that doctor visit. But the optimist in me is looking for the external signs to support my internal changes. And my blood pressure remains high; that half-full glass is looking even more empty!
And the spiral continues, but in a downward spin. What is this about? All signs, whether they are inward or outward, point to lessons. There’s something karmic here; something much deeper than qigong practice and meditation. And I need to dig down where that spiral is drilling to wedge out this darkness that is shadowing my optimism. And no matter how deeply we dig for the lead or the gold, there is always another layer to dredge up, examine and alchemically transform. The signs point the way; they are critical signs to follow.
I am reading those signs carefully; I am taking my blood pressure multiple times a day. I am asking many questions and looking deeply in the dark mirror, working to clear it of dust. I am watching but not expecting new external signs any time soon. And that’s OK; I have time.
And I’m taking a newly prescribed drug (two, actually, in one pill). Yes, I have at least temporarily resorted to western medicine’s approach to my condition. I am hopeful this will improve my pressure and give me more time for the natural approach to kick in.
Yes, I read the sign, and while I didn’t like the direction it pointed, I realize there are many more lessons for this western man to learn, many more internal adjustments to make and many more years to practice!










What Does Self-Love Look Like? –Richard’s Commentary
March 21, 2013 — Richard“Love creates. Love bonds. Love attracts and holds securely. Love frees. Love develops and Love lets go. Love releases bonds that no longer serve.”
When I first read Rosemary’s “litany” about Love, Paul’s letter to the Corinthians came to mind, that often used text in Christian weddings: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” (Quoted from the NIV Bible published by Zondervan.)
While these lists of what Love looks like are superficially very different, they certainly are parallel. Rosemary’s list is about creation and development. There are bonds in Love but those bonds need to serve, not hinder growth. And Paul’s description of Love can certainly apply to creative development, growth. His words almost more appropriately apply to the Love between parent and child; there is a definite paternal quality to his list which likely reflected his feelings toward the Corithians.
Then how do these descriptions of Love apply to Self-Love, the main topic of Rosemary’s post? Creation and development are key in Rosemary’s list. And I believe this is very true for Self-Love to grow and flourish. As humans we can never stop growing, Life is about learning our lessons. And these lessons are all about the evolution of Consciousness. The explosive creation of the Universe, out of Love, initiated this entire evolutionary expansion we find ourselves in the midst of. If we were loved into existence then isn’t it incumbent on us to continue that love-stream?
Then look at what Paul says in the context of Self-Love: it is all about development, growth of a child. What if we apply these actions of patience, kindness, recording no wrongs toward ourselves? This creates an environment for learning our lessons, for expanding our consciousness and contributing to the evolution of Consciousness.
Paul’s and Rosemary’s litanies about Love turn out to be highly parallel and mutually supportive!
And what if we treat ourselves as they both implore? Rosemary says “Love releases bonds that no longer serve.” And Paul says Love “keeps no record of wrongs.” These words are describing forgiveness. And, for me, Self-Love and self-forgiveness are closely bound. There can’t be one without the other. I can only love myself from the capacity to forgive myself. And I can only forgive myself from that secure base of Self-Love.
When I am feeling low I sometimes need to drag out that “record of wrongs” I keep on myself and remember they are past wrongs that I need to let go; I need to release those “bonds that no longer serve.” This is a recurring theme for me; forgiving myself is at the base of picking myself up by my own bootstraps.
“Love is kind, it is not rude, it is not easily angered.” “Love frees.” I need to apply these words to me, often and always. Then perhaps I’ll more easily know what Self-Love does look like. And then, too, I’ll be contributing more to the evolution of Consciousness!
What does Self-Love look like for you?