MUSE-INGS: The Magnet is the Picture You Think

July 12, 2011 — Rosemary

This message is certainly timely for me! So many times I find myself spiraling down into thoughts and worries and then pulling myself back up using tools for Conscious Living. Yes, even those of us who teach this must constantly remind ourselves to use the tools we teach!

It does become easier with practice and we catch ourselves much earlier than we used to, but it still is a knee-jerk, human reaction to start thinking about what could be wrong or what needs to be fixed or what is not going the way we want it to go. The most important tool to use is Awareness.

How aware are you of the thoughts that you have? You can think or speak or tell your story without being aware of the energy of your thoughts. You’re just sharing the story, right? You’re just reporting the facts, right? You’re just trying to figure out the solutions, right?

Well, maybe you need to adjust your thinking about all that. Every time you tell a story of your woes you are traveling back into the thoughts that attracted that woe into your life. This is not to blame you for something or to say you are wrong but to show you how focusing on the story of the problem energizes keeping that problem in your life.

But what if you were to talk about possible solutions instead? If you feel the need to discuss a situation with someone, talk from the energy of seeking solutions, not of getting commiseration about ‘poor you.’ Train yourself to notice when you are thinking about a problem and spiraling downward into the depths of that problem instead of pulling yourself up above the problem to seek a solution. Follow the thought into the set of possible solutions rather than into the depths of the problem, for the light is shining in the solutions not the problems.

When you share something with others, be open to their helping you to see possibilities rather than woes. Allow the energy of the sharing to lift your own energy into problem-solving rather than sympathy seeking.

This is how you shift your own energetic electromagnet so that your beacon into the Universe can attract what you want instead of energizing what you don’t want.

Awareness is key. What are my thoughts sending out? Picture your mind creating a picture of something with every thought. Neuo-Linguistic Programming [NLP] is one of the techniques that I use when working with clients and NLP teaches that, in order to make sense of a thought or statement your mind must first make a picture of that statement. So ‘I don’t want to be sad’ creates a picture of you in a sad state. That picture in your mind sends out the energy of sadness. And in creating this picture your unconscious mind has to ignore the ‘don’t want’ part of the statement. The picture becomes the energy which becomes the magnet.

Be aware of your magnetic beacon. This beacon is at work at all times. Create the pictures that you WANT to have beamed out into the Universe. And you do this by taking charge of your thoughts.

Create beautiful pictures this week!

________________________

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THIS WEEK’S MYSTIC MESSAGE from The Divine Feminine: “What’s Your Magnet Attracting?”

July 11, 2011 — Rosemary

Dear Ones,

What are the energies that you are putting out into the Universe to attract to you what is happening in your life? Do you worry about money? Do you fret about relationships? Are you stuck in a place that is uncomfortable and focusing on that discomfort?

Think of yourself as a beacon in the darkness. Whatever energy you generate with your mind becomes the energetic electromagnetic beam that radiates outward from you. As a beacon you are sending this magnetic beam out into the Universe inviting like energies to attach to the beam. What are you attracting?

Some people discount what is called ‘The Law of Attraction’ but this is a law of the Universe, whether you believe in it or not. Just as the Law of Gravity works on Planet Earth whether you understand how it works or not. We are teaching you that the Law of Attraction is at work in your life right now, no matter what you think about the Law.

Because you are a thinking individual your thoughts are energetically charged at all times. You are creating magnets with every thought. What were you thinking about just before your started reading this? Was it attracting what you want in your life or what you don’t want? When you become conscious of yourself as a beacon into the vast Universe inviting into your life whatever the energy of your thoughts attract, then you can see what is playing out in your life as a manifestation of previous thoughts.

Even if you don’t remember ‘asking’ [or attracting] what you have, you can probably remember thinking about it. Now, we are not criticizing you for the thoughts that you have had in the past, for you were learning about how the Universe works. You might have implanted beliefs and thought patterns from decades ago, or borrowed from your parents and ancestors, that you didn’t even know that you had accepted. But the fact that your thoughts from the past have created patterns in your present life does not mean that you cannot change those patterns NOW.

This is what you are called to do. Examine your thoughts, your beliefs, in light of what you are learning about living a Conscious Life. Can you identify patterns that are not supporting your personal growth? Do you have situations in your life that you must examine for what you can change about your thinking about those situations?

For example, are you worrying about something and not seeing what there is for you to do about that situation? Perhaps the place to start is to get control of your thoughts about the situation. Every time that your worry surfaces, shift to considering one action you can take away from that worry. This is not to say that you must escape into fantasy rather than face front on what is going on, but rather that you can think of one aspect of that situation over which you have enough control to take one action. Look for one benefit that you receive from that situation. This might be very small or seemingly insignificant, but what is the one benefit you can think of that you have derived or are deriving from being in that situation? Now feel grateful for that one benefit.

Gratitude will move you forward into finding solutions. The energy of Gratitude, when it creates the magnet of your beacon into the Universe, attracts to you more opportunities to feel Gratitude.

And if you cannot find one benefit in your present situation? Then be grateful for the knowledge that you are perceptive enough to know that you must take steps to change the situation. Again, let your beacon contain a different energy than judgment or frustration or disappointment or anger and you will attract different energies into your life.

Try this today with something that is troubling you. You will see a difference. Be gentle with yourself and practice being a Conscious Beacon so that what you attract is what you really want.

And so it is.

________________________

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Upstream or Downstream? Your Choice!

June 13, 2011 — Rosemary

Dear Ones,

The energy of these days is spiraling upward so that more people are called to notice how they are feeling and what they are being called to do and to be. Have you paid attention to how you feel when you experience different situations? Do you tune in to your body when you are around certain people to see what your inner sense of the experience is telling you?

No longer can you gravitate toward those situations that you once thought were comfortable if you feel drawn to elevate your energy levels by making different choices. No longer can you associate with those people whose energy drains you or pulls you down when you feel as if you could be soaring with the eagles. No longer will you be living in a place where the energy is not compatible with the human being that you are evolving into when there are other places on Planet Earth that are more compatible with your new vibratory frequencies.

It is time for you to move forward in your personal growth. Is there a job, a relationship or a town that you must move beyond in order that you might continue your growth? What do you hold as a vision of your future and how compatible is the space in which you currently find yourself? What changes are you feeling called to make in your life immediately, not some day conveniently in the future?

Who are you shifting into? Where is your energetic pattern? What is the next level of growth for you?

All of these questions are important questions for you, for no human can stagnate where they currently are if they wish to remain a conscious human being. Those who choose to stagnate will actually feel as if they are swimming upstream. Those who choose to grow will be flowing downstream easily and effortlessly as they are carried by the current of 21st Century human evolution. Allowing the growth, the expansion to occur actually frees you to explore new ways of being. When you know that you can let go of old patterns of behavior then you are free to choose new modes of operation that bring you further development of the new human that you are becoming. Think of the animals that must shed their skins to grow and develop new outer bodies. You are like those animals. You must shed the skin of that which has been binding you to the underdeveloped you. Let go of that constricting shell and allow yourself to move freely as you develop the outer expression of the new ‘inner you.’ Feel how free you are when you are no longer confined to the boundaries that you previously thought defined you.

Now notice that you are attracting to yourself the kind of people who are also feeling free of restrictive boundaries and who are exploring their own personal growth experiences.

The more conscious of this growth you become the faster the growth pace accelerates. Your work becomes your play as you allow the expansion, rather than forcing or fighting that energy. The new you has its own new energy field. Everything around you will align to this new field. And everything that no longer resonates with your energy will fall away from you.

Relax. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. Each day is unfolding as it must to support you in your personal growth. Start each day with gratitude for the, as yet, unknown opportunities for growth and a curiosity about what those opportunities will look like. Enjoy the process!

And so it is.

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: “Power is a loaded concept!” by Rosemary Bredeson

April 19, 2011 — Rosemary

We often think of power when we think of governments or titans of business or the power of the strong over the weak.  But I like to think of power as electricity, the power that runs the computer or the dishwasher, the power that enhances the usefulness of an appliance or a person because they are plugged into the source.

Where does your power come from?  Are you constantly looking outside yourself for validation or energy or acceptance?  If so, are you giving away your power to others?

I know it is not easy to admit that we are giving away our power but it happens all the time, and often in subtle ways.  If someone is really bugging you, do you let it eat away at you all day?  That’s a form of giving away your power.  How about a romantic partner?  Are you holding in your feelings and going along with what they want instead of standing up for yourself or speaking your mind in the relationship?  This is another way that it is easy to give away your power.  How about at work or in your business – are you constantly deferring to others rather than standing up for your opinions and backing up your own suggestions? You give away your power at work, too.

There are times in every parent’s life when they choose to give power to the 2-year-old tyrant because the parent has become exhausted by the tantrum.  Admit it, you’ve probably done this once or twice if you’re a parent.  And if you have a pet, you have probably, once or twice, given them an extra treat when they whined or performed or begged, right?

What about when you didn’t vote in an election and were disappointed in the result – did you give away your power then?  Have you stood by silently and allowed one person to tell a joke that offended someone else in the group?  That’s another way of giving away your power.

There are so many situations in your life that give you an opportunity to claim your power as it comes from within you or to quietly allow that power to drift away from you.  We do it with our parents, our kids, our bosses, our mates, even our pets.  But the most insidious giving up of our powers comes when we fail to examine our beliefs, our own thoughts.  Sometimes we give our power up to a belief that has been handed down to us for generations because we never stop to examine that belief and to question whether it is actually true for us today.

Have you ever seen a family of doctors where the family belief is that all the male children become doctors?  Or ‘everyone in our family is a lawyer/farmer/accountant/teacher/whatever’?  And how often is there a child in the family who has amazing talent as a dancer or a painter but they allow that to be a hobby because they feel compelled to become a doctor or a lawyer or a teacher?   They give away their power to the belief that came from outside of them.

When I work with clients we often uncover beliefs that they aren’t even aware they are carrying but that cause them to give away their inner connection to their power because they’ve never examined that belief before.  Ask yourself if there are any beliefs about power or your inner power that you can examine and maybe choose to change.

Beliefs are powerful things.  Make sure you are choosing consciously to believe what you believe.  Examine the source of your beliefs, especially around power.  It is a good thing to be in touch with your inner power.  This is not the same as exerting power over the powerless.  See if you have any hidden beliefs around this issue that might be holding you back from manifesting your Life Purpose on the Planet.  This exercise could turn your Life around!

________________________

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THIS WEEK’S MYSTIC MESSAGE from The Sirius Mystery Temple

March 8, 2011 — Rosemary

This message comes from the teachers at The Sirius Mystery Temple who are giving me teachings about the Fifth Dimension of Consciousness.  I am researching the Twelve Dimensions and these teachers are in a dimension around the star Sirius.  This channeled teaching is about the Consciousness of Money.

“Money is an exchange of energy between two parties who have agreed upon its value.  That is it.  Money has no value outside the transaction that establishes its value by the agreement of two parties.  Just as a house has a set value only when two parties contract to exchange the house for money at an agreed-upon amount.

“Those who hoard money do not understand or appreciate that money is intended to be in circulation in a society.  Money is an energy flow and, as such, must be kept flowing.  Because its value is determined by an agreement between humans (or entities) then there must be a flow of energy.  Those who spend more money than they have are also interrupting the flow of energy because the agreed-upon value of a transaction does not have the energy it needs to flow.

“Monetary systems create artificial value that does not have the appropriate energy in it.  This is why they can collapse.

“Those who are working to expand their consciousness must examine their relationship with money.  If they are afraid to spend it then they must examine that fear.  If they spend too much then they must examine why that is so.

“The rules of a Conscious Relationship with Money are as follows:

  1. Do not allow the energy of money to stagnate with you.  Hold onto what you need to feel secure.  Designate different funds with a purpose for the money in them so that a use, an energy, is attached to that fund.
  2. Share money with those who are not conscious enough yet to create wealth for themselves.
  3. Do not owe money to others.  Pay your debts.  Create a spending plan and stick to it as well as you can; i.e., do not overspend.
  4. Do not allow others to take your money from you.  Collect what is owed to you.  Make conscious choices about giving away money.
  5. Share what you have.  Tip generously.  Choose charities wisely and support the causes you believe in.
  6. Examine your beliefs around money, especially the source of those beliefs.  If you are growing in consciousness then what your parents and grandparents believed may no longer be relevant.
  7. It is all right to use money for fun.  It is also all right to save some money.  Make conscious choices about both.

“The Consciousness of Money boils down to this:  Money is Energy.  It needs to flow.  Two people determine the value of money in every transaction.  Money has no intrinsic value.

“It is important, then, not to imbue it with any.  Do not worship at the altar of money.  Rather, see money as part of the flow of energy in the Universe.  Treat it as such.”

________________________

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THIS WEEK’S MYSTIC MESSAGE from The Divine Feminine: “Give Away the Gifts You Have”

January 31, 2011 — Rosemary

Dear Ones,

The energy within you, the gifts you have been given, are not for you alone.  You are meant to share your gifts with the World and especially with those who are close around you.

Do you mistakenly believe that you do not have gifts?  We would tell you that everyone who takes on human form on Planet Earth brings with them into this lifetime many gifts.  Are you not recognizing those gifts that are yours?

Start by looking at what other people value in you.  What strengths do you bring to your relationships?  What are people reflecting back to you about their relationship with you?  What are people asking you to do for them or share with them or advise them about?  The answers to these questions will bring you clues about your gifts and what they are.

Remember when you were a little child, what was your favorite game to play?  This, too, will give you a clue to your gifts.  What did you dream about becoming when you grew up?  What kind of books did you read or movies did you watch?  Can you look at your young life and see a pattern emerging that indicates what gifts you incarnated with?

The gifts you have are yours to share because you are a part of a Universal Plan that is unfolding as your entire Soul Group has requested it.  Each member of a Soul Group agrees before incarnating that they will hold a certain energy to support the growth and evolution of the consciousness of all the others in that group.  Throughout your life the contact with other members of your Soul Group may become stronger or it may lessen but you have agreed to be a part of the lessons that all members are learning.  They have agreed to help you to learn your lessons as well.

Your gifts are the parts of you that enhance the lives of others around you.  For example, one who has a gift of music must share that music and, thus, enhance the lives around them.  For you, your gift might be a gift of healing and you bring healing energy to those with whom you come into contact.  Perhaps your gift is the gift of making other people feel comfortable, and you will find that there are many opportunities along your path for you to do so.

Whatever your gifts are, make sure that you are sharing them.  If you are not sure what gifts you have, then work with someone who can help you to uncover them.  You have gifts – this is a certainty.  If you are looking for the gift of creativity and your gift is to hold the traditional form then you will not recognize or value your own gifts.  You must accept without judgment the gifts that are yours for they have a place in the grander scheme of Life on Planet Earth.  When you deny your gifts or refuse to share them then you are impacting far more people than just yourself.

Be open.  Be honest with yourself about your gifts.  Recognize, develop and share your gifts.  Your gifts are for giving to others.

And so it is.

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: There is hope for humanity! by Rosemary Bredeson

January 18, 2011 — Rosemary

If we can all bring our focus away from what divides us and, instead, work with the energies that unite us, we can solve the problems of humanity.

The evolutionary spirit of human beings depends upon an understanding of the connectedness of all Life.  The evolutionary process did not stop when a man chose to walk upright on 2 legs, or when the hairy beast lost some fur.  We continue to evolve and the Heart-Mind Center that is appearing in Conscious Humans is another sign that evolution is still at work on the species.

We NEED this evolutionary change at this time!  We need to figure out some new ways of being because a lot of the old ways no long work in the 21st Century world we live in.  The only important question is, Are you willing to evolve or are you struggling to hold on to the old ways of being?

How wonderful that we are being given a new energy center to help us in this process.  How kind of the Universe to help us along.  Are you willing to work to develop this energy center in yourself?  What does that entail?

Loving yourself is the first step.  Take care of yourself – body, mind, spirit, energy.  Many people are going to the gym but how many are going inside and meditating?  Many people are studying or delving deeply into intellectual topics but how many are expanding their spiritual understandings?

Loving yourself isn’t just about taking a spa vacation or taking time to be entertained.  There is an active quality about loving yourself that requires that you continually move in the direction of your highest good.  What stretches you to greater spiritual understanding?  What increases the Love in you that can radiate outwardly to others?  How can you come to a better understanding of the concept that All are One?  Do you ever wrestle with questions like these?  Do you have others with whom you can explore these ideas?

It is time to find community, a tribe, a collection of people who, like you, are explorers in the realm of Consciousness and who are open to learning that previously held ideas may no longer be valid.  Do you sometimes feel that you are the only one in your community who holds ideas that are considered heretical by some?  You are not alone even if it feels that way.

Humanity is waking up.  Eyes are being opened.  Hearts are reaching out for a purer vibration of Love.  Minds are questioning longtime notions that seem to have served their purpose and no longer apply to the 21st Century world.  Every time you start to question something you or others once believed, you are joined by others who are also questing after new knowledge.  The Heart-Mind Center is the point of connection between you.  Play with this concept and explore.  Find someone to ask who can explore with you.

All are One.  Every question in you is also in others.  Find them.

And remember that you cannot shut down your evolving Heart-Mind Center.  If you are part of this community and are reading these words, then the time for you to evolve is upon you.  Reach for your highest good in all things.  Many of us are reaching with you and for you.  You are supported.  The changes that are coming will be good for you if you keep your focus on growth.

All are One.  You are never alone for that would be a violation of the Law of Nature that All are One.  Take my hand and together we can walk forward and upright.  Then we can reach out for other hands to bring them along with us.

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: What are your ‘old pajamas’? by Rosemary Bredeson

January 11, 2011 — Rosemary

That dirty lens can really distort what we see!

So many of our experiences seem to hang around with us.  Have you ever talked to someone who was clinging to some story from the past, telling it over and over but never seeming to be able to move beyond it?  I think some people in support groups like to tell their story over and over because it allows them to continue to think of themselves as a victim and they don’t see their way clearly beyond that state.

Or do you know someone who is ‘not talking to’ someone else because of something that happened years or even decades ago?  And isn’t it laughable when they can’t even remember exactly why they made that decision but they’re sticking to it?  We trip ourselves up this way all the time.  We cling to something from the past until it is like a pair of old pajamas, comfy but probably so ragged it should be relegated to the rag pile.

Why are we so ready to stay with the comfort of the familiar even when it isn’t truly that comfortable?  We do it all the time.  We choose the familiar when we have a choice because we know what it feels like and the ‘new’ has an unknown quality about it that might be worse than what we know.  How are you doing this in your Life today?  What is the ‘old pajamas’ in your Life that you are holding onto beyond its useful time?

In a literal sense, mine is an old [at least 25 years old!] Redskins nightshirt.  You can probably read the New York Times through it but it’s my comfort choice.  What’s your metaphorical Redskins nightshirt?

When I work with some clients, they are amazed at the ideas that are clouding the lens through which they are looking at Life.  We make decisions about what to believe when we are little children and those decisions continue to shape the way we see ourselves and our lives.  We relate to our families and friends and co-workers and we take in, at an unconscious level, what we perceive to be their attitudes toward us.  We may not even be correct in these assessments but we make decisions based on these mind-reads and they continue to have an emotional impact on us.  And we do not understand what is going on at the level of the unconscious mind if we don’t shine a light there and examine it.

Spend some time asking yourself if you have any ‘old pajamas’ in your Life.  What are you clinging to, what story or belief or thought about yourself, are you holding onto because it is familiar, even though it may not be in your highest good to continue to hold it?  The answer can be startling.  I’ve seen people remember something that happened when they were 5 or 7 or 11 that has colored how they see themselves since that time but they were unaware of that influence.  You might have relationship or business or spiritual issues that are stemming from some belief that you have held in your unconscious mind for most of your Life that you didn’t realize was at work on your emotions and your decisions in the present day.

Take a look around the closet of your mind and decide what you are ready to relegate to the rag pile.  Get some help with this if you need it.  ‘Old pajamas’ don’t need to be the only ones you wear!

________________________

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THIS WEEK’S MYSTIC MESSAGE from The Divine Feminine: “Is your lens dirty?”

January 10, 2011 — Rosemary

Dear Ones,

We are seeing many people who are excited about the new energy of this time but others are struggling with the old baggage of emotional drains that they are carrying with them.  The future cannot look bright when seen through the dirty lens of all the old emotions, energies, hurts and disappointments.  If you identify yourself as one who is looking ahead through a lens from the past, then resolve to clear that lens and choose to look at your future in The Light.

The way that you perceive your Life, past, present and future, is a choice that you are constantly making.  Are you focused on disappointments?  You will bring those from the past into your present and future as you look at your Life.  Do you spend a lot of time thinking about things that have gone wrong?  You will be seeking that which could go wrong in the present or the future.

Or do you think about, dwell on, remember the good things that you have experienced?  The times you have enjoyed love and laughter and fun?  Do you focus your attention on the people that you have enjoyed or that you are enjoying today?  Do you remind yourself that you are loved into existence by a Universe that wants to support you?  When you think about uplifting ideas, remembrances or thoughts you actually lift your own vibration with The Light.  And you are always choosing where to focus your attention.

In every moment you decide where you will place your attention and your focus.  Even if you have a natural tendency to focus on the dark or what is not right or what could go wrong, you make a choice whether or not to follow that inclination.  Decide now that you will consciously choose to focus on where The Light is shining the brightest in this moment.  Make that decision and you will start to notice that there is always Light around you.  Even in your darkest moments, when it seems as if there is no Light shining anywhere, there is always a glimmer of Light to be found if you but search for it.

Think about the image of a dirty lens through which you are looking at your Life.  What will it take for you to clean that lens today so that you can see a brighter future?  What can you do in this moment to notice that The Light is with you right now?  Why would you or anyone choose to dim The Light that is always shining?

That dirty lens was encrusted over time by experiences that you decided were uncomfortable or unhappy or wrong or unjust.  Your judgment created the dirt on that lens.  Every experience that you have had has carried with it a lesson for you to learn.  Every thing that you have gone through, every moment you have lived, has created the wonderful human being that you are today.  Every speck of dust on that lens has stayed there because you haven’t yet been ready to clean the lens and let it go.

Decide, right now, in this present moment, that you will look through a clean lens at what is before you, now and in every future moment.  Decide that you appreciate your Life Experiences for what they have taught you but that you do not need to carry them with you as a way of defining the present and the future.

All you have of your Life is this present moment.  Your past and your future exist in this moment only.  Limiting your perceptions by carrying the emotional residue of the past with you, or narrowing your perspective on the moments that are yet to exist because you choose not to see all possibilities, are choices that you CAN make, but do you really WANT to make those choices?

Choose to see The Light as it is presented to you in every moment.  Choose to see through a clear lens at the possibilities as they unfold before you.  Leave behind you that which does not serve you today.  Decide to Live in The Light.

You will love the energy there!

And so it is.

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: It’s always about the energy! by Rosemary Bredeson

November 23, 2010 — Rosemary

People seem to be growing more sensitive to energies and noticing the energy of a group can really be a protective measure.  I’ve noticed that some groups seem to shift energies from comfortable to dynamic to uncomfortable [for me] and sometimes it’s hard to pinpoint what is happening. Groups of 3 people can have a dynamic based on who wields more power in that trio while huge groups of 200 can have an amorphous energy that feels benign in the large group but contains many subgroups that have their own dynamic.  Have you seen this in the groups in which you participate?

When you are sensitive to the energies around you, you might find yourself gravitating toward those people and groups whose energy patterns are compatible with yours.  You might also find yourself moving away from groups, even those you have been a part of for a long time, when the energy feels as if it has shifted and no longer supports you or your personal growth. This is happening for a lot of people with churches and organizations that, at one time, served them but no longer do so.

People grow.  At least, Conscious People grow.  For those who are pursuing a life of evolutionary consciousness, many groups complete their purpose in a person’s life and that person must make a choice about whether to continue to associate with the group or to move on.  This does not always have to be painful or difficult or done in anger or sadness. This is just the path of an evolutionary person.  Just as you do not stay in grade school for your whole life, some associations complete their usefulness for your personal growth and you ‘graduate’ from them. The graceful way to leave these groups is to bless them on their own way while accepting that your path parts from theirs on the journey.

Have you ever seen someone stay a part of a group only to criticize and complain about that group? Doesn’t that make you wonder why they stay a member?  And what about families that get together for a holiday celebration but the individuals can’t wait for the so-called ‘celebration’ to be over so they can go to be with their friends?  At times, a group or even a family no longer supports one on one’s journey.  It might take a lot of energy to move out of a familiar group or to decide to spend less time with a family that makes one feel uncomfortable.  One alternative to leaving is to see if the group is willing to shift its energy into a space that feels more comfortable to the person considering leaving.

This can be a tall order but it can have dramatic results.  In some cases, just pointing out that old patterns have jumped up again and that perhaps they don’t belong in the 21st Century gathering can cause people to reconsider their behaviors.  Sometimes you can simply ask to be treated differently.  I’ve seen this work with people who tease and joke to the point of causing emotional pain to another but, when requested, stop acting that way.  It might be helpful to think ahead to a gathering where you anticipate feeling uncomfortable and ask yourself how you wish it were different.  Energize that different picture of the gathering, and believe that you can ask others to participate in the new vision.

And even if others don’t want to change the situation, it might be that gaining a perspective on what is going on helps YOU to change how you feel about the situation. Understanding the energy of a group and how it depends on the energy that you bring to it can give you new insights into your participation in that group.  Decide that you can shift or they can shift or you can drift away.

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