THIS WEEK’S MYSTIC MESSAGE from The Divine Feminine: “What’s Your Big Question Today?”

April 25, 2011 — Rosemary

Every one of you has a question or two about your life on Planet Earth that it is difficult to ask.  For some of you it is the proverbial ‘Why am I here?’ question.  For others, it is something like ‘What happens when we die?’  And then many of you wonder about all sorts of ideas that have been proposed that you do not feel have been proven to your satisfaction, like the existence of Life elsewhere in the Universe or the actual origins of the chemicals and minerals of the planets or the nature of animals or other living things on your planet.  Questions abound when the thinking mind explores the world around the person.

The danger comes when a person stops asking questions because of one of these two reasons:  they stop being curious and thus choose not to explore, or they believe that they have all the answers and thus do not need to ask any more questions.

Do you fall into one of these two categories?  Do you sometimes get tired of the ‘not knowing’ and wish you had all the answers?  Or do you sometimes get tired of always finding another question to ask?  Or both?

Believe this, Dear One:  you are a questing being.  Your soul incarnated in your body so that you could ask questions and learn the answers which would lead to more questions as you explore the world around you.  You chose to incarnate on Planet Earth at this time so that you could learn all about 21st Century Earth and her peoples, the environment, the societies, the ideas, the poetry, the art, the cuisines.  You incarnated in a particular family so that you could learn all that that family had to teach you.

Let’s talk about that last sentence for a moment.  Have you wondered why you were born to the family you were born to?  Maybe you grew up feeling like an outsider, or maybe your mother gave you up for adoption and you were raised by some other family.  Do you have an answer for why you were born where and to whom you were born?  Examining this is a part of growing into who you incarnated to be.  Why those particular parents?  Siblings?  Why that school/philosophy/religion/neighborhood/country?  There are lots of aspects of your early life that you can examine to understand more fully how you have been shaped by those very aspects.

The uncurious mind doesn’t bother to explore these questions but one who would grow, who would develop, experiences a certain curiosity about their origins that helps to elaborate on their understanding of Self.  Did you ever wonder about your rebellious or non-rebellious nature as a young person?  What do you suppose that was about?

You rebelled against what was helping you to define yourself, or you chose not to rebel in obvious ways because you chose to adopt what was being presented to you.  The process of growing up is a process much like shopping for a new outfit of clothing.  You try on several to see if they fit, if they are comfortable, if they present the image you wish to project and to see if they are appropriate for who you are in that moment.  When you are growing as a person you are exposed to many new ideas, philosophies, possibilities and you try them on for a fit.  Some you discard, some you adopt and some you modify.

This process never ends.  As long as you are breathing you are exploring the wonder called ‘Life.’  Adopt a curious attitude about what is around you.  Examine it and yourself for ways that you can grow.  Learn from everything that happens or appears around you.  And enjoy the process!

This IS Life!

And so it is.

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: What are your ‘old pajamas’? by Rosemary Bredeson

January 11, 2011 — Rosemary

That dirty lens can really distort what we see!

So many of our experiences seem to hang around with us.  Have you ever talked to someone who was clinging to some story from the past, telling it over and over but never seeming to be able to move beyond it?  I think some people in support groups like to tell their story over and over because it allows them to continue to think of themselves as a victim and they don’t see their way clearly beyond that state.

Or do you know someone who is ‘not talking to’ someone else because of something that happened years or even decades ago?  And isn’t it laughable when they can’t even remember exactly why they made that decision but they’re sticking to it?  We trip ourselves up this way all the time.  We cling to something from the past until it is like a pair of old pajamas, comfy but probably so ragged it should be relegated to the rag pile.

Why are we so ready to stay with the comfort of the familiar even when it isn’t truly that comfortable?  We do it all the time.  We choose the familiar when we have a choice because we know what it feels like and the ‘new’ has an unknown quality about it that might be worse than what we know.  How are you doing this in your Life today?  What is the ‘old pajamas’ in your Life that you are holding onto beyond its useful time?

In a literal sense, mine is an old [at least 25 years old!] Redskins nightshirt.  You can probably read the New York Times through it but it’s my comfort choice.  What’s your metaphorical Redskins nightshirt?

When I work with some clients, they are amazed at the ideas that are clouding the lens through which they are looking at Life.  We make decisions about what to believe when we are little children and those decisions continue to shape the way we see ourselves and our lives.  We relate to our families and friends and co-workers and we take in, at an unconscious level, what we perceive to be their attitudes toward us.  We may not even be correct in these assessments but we make decisions based on these mind-reads and they continue to have an emotional impact on us.  And we do not understand what is going on at the level of the unconscious mind if we don’t shine a light there and examine it.

Spend some time asking yourself if you have any ‘old pajamas’ in your Life.  What are you clinging to, what story or belief or thought about yourself, are you holding onto because it is familiar, even though it may not be in your highest good to continue to hold it?  The answer can be startling.  I’ve seen people remember something that happened when they were 5 or 7 or 11 that has colored how they see themselves since that time but they were unaware of that influence.  You might have relationship or business or spiritual issues that are stemming from some belief that you have held in your unconscious mind for most of your Life that you didn’t realize was at work on your emotions and your decisions in the present day.

Take a look around the closet of your mind and decide what you are ready to relegate to the rag pile.  Get some help with this if you need it.  ‘Old pajamas’ don’t need to be the only ones you wear!

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: You’re #1 [Priority!] by Rosemary Bredeson

December 28, 2010 — Rosemary

How often do we hear that we are supposed to love ourselves?  And how often do we NEED to hear it?

When we get really busy, around holidays or our work’s busy season, for example, we tend to put taking care of ourselves on the back burner.  For whatever reason, and we can certainly come up with some good excuses, we just don’t get around to that ‘taking care of ourselves’ stuff!

So today I am going to ask you to join me in moving forward in the commitment to put taking care of Self at the top of the priority list.

Do you make lists?  To-do lists?  Shopping lists?  Gift lists?  Who determines the priorities on those lists?  From my studies of neuro-linguistic programming and hypnosis I’ve learned that our unconscious mind is in charge, whether we know it or not and whether we like it or not.  We can write a list of priorities that look the way we consciously want them to look or as we feel we ‘should’ prioritize our values, but it really is more important to determine what really matters and what really motivates us.  The list might look different, and usually does, when we work with our unconscious mind to determine our values and our priorities.

So what can you do to make sure that loving yourself makes it to the top of your priority list?  Decide.  Commit to yourself.  And do the work to examine your unconscious mind and its priorities.  Keep track of your activities one day.  Watch how you spend your time.  What is so urgent that it bumps other things off your to-do list?  See if you can put something on the list that is only about taking care of yourself. Does it get done?  Does it stay on the list or does it get pushed aside by emergencies?  Just notice.  This is not about beating yourself up but about becoming curious about exactly where your motivating forces reside within you.

Now try scheduling that ‘me time’ that you need.  What would you do with an hour, a half-hour, 15-minutes of ‘me time’?  Make an appointment with yourself for this and keep that time sacred.  It could start with a simple 5-minute meditation or a walk around the block or 15 minutes without answering emails or the phone.  I frequently take ‘tea time’ for myself.  I make myself tea and get a piece of fruit or a graham cracker and sit with a book and sip tea.  I don’t jump up to answer the phone.  I step away from the computer.  I’ve learned that everything that tries to intrude on my ‘tea time’ can wait a half-hour to be handled.

It might take some practice to ignore a ringing phone, but we do have caller ID now so, if it is an emergency you can probably detect it.  You can set certain times each day that you check email and facebook and keep to that schedule so that those activities are not eating up your ‘me time.’  What activity really feeds your spirit?  Do you like to write or read or play piano or make jewelry?  I like to do all of these things and sometimes I just need to go to the piano and play one song to give myself a break from pondering a problem or getting things done.  It’s like a meditation to get lost in the music for a few minutes.

Decide what feels good to you and then do it no matter what else tries to claim your attention or your time.  You’ll find that the energy you gain from taking time for yourself makes you more productive in your other activities.  If you break away from doing for others for a bit you can be more fully present to them when you move back into that shared space.

Let’s make Self-Love a priority and do the work it takes to keep it at the top of the list!

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: Live Your Values Consciously! by Rosemary Bredeson

November 30, 2010 — Rosemary

It feels as if we are frequently being asked to ask ourselves, “What really matters?”  We get all worked up about something that bothers or frustrates or upsets us.  But if we pause and ask, “What really matters in this situation?” would we get so worked up?

It really does seem as if time is speeding up and that the days no longer have the full 24 hours available to us.  Does it seem that way to you, too?  Whether it’s the Photon Belt or the Earth’s rotation on its axis or some other reason, the FEELING that time is speeding up can lead us to making some decisions about  how to spend the time that we do have.

I know there are many days that I wake up with an expectation of what my to-do list looks like but I seem to get caught up in the drama of the day and often get pulled off that list to take care of someone else’s drama.  I’m sure that has happened to you, too, hasn’t it?  So how do we take back control of our own time?

The first step is to decide what our own values are.  Not what we wish they were or what we think they should be, but what we truly believe our values are, deep in our heart.  I learned some good exercises when I trained in NLP [Neuro-Linguistic Programming] that help to identify the values that our unconscious minds hold and they are often not what we ‘think’ our values are.  How can this be?  Our conscious minds use logic not emotion when coming up with a list of values but our unconscious minds develop the list from our emotional beliefs and understandings, of ourselves and of our lives.  The unconscious mind is focused on surviving the day, based on whatever it believes about our safety and security.  While one’s conscious mind might think that eating healthy foods is a high value, the unconscious mind might be remembering a time when food was scarce and created a desire to eat everything in sight in case there’s no more food to eat later.  One’s conscious mind might think that being with friends is the most important thing to do today while the unconscious mind might be craving some alone time.  The body might respond to this values conflict by creating illness so that the alone time takes precedence over the friend time.

Do you see how this works?  Have you ever experienced this seeming contradiction?  What do you do about it?

Well, as in most things, when living a Conscious Life, the first thing to do is to hit the ‘pause button’ and really look at how time is being spent.  Again, not in how you wish it were but in how it is realistically being devoted to activities.  Keep a time diary, in 15 minute increments, for a few days.  No judgments here, just record, from a curious, non-judgmental and accepting viewpoint.  Do you need more alone time? You might see you are pulling out of social engagements, always having a good reason but maybe it is because you have said ‘yes’ to something that your unconscious mind wanted you to say ‘no’ to.  Are you avoiding being with someone that you think you like but that you seem to have lots of reasons to avoid?  Maybe that person really doesn’t resonate with you but you haven’t yet figured out how to shift things so that you don’t have to spend time with them.

The list can go on and on, but the important thing to realize is that, conscious or unconscious, your values, what really matters to you, is driving your life at some level.  Even if you frequently make choices that contradict the values of your unconscious mind, you will start to find the debilitating nature of illness or accident or drama pointing the way for you to find answers about what you truly value in your life.

Doesn’t it make sense to do the personal growth work so that you can become conscious about your values and the choices that you are making?  Make a commitment to start this work today!

________________________

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THIS WEEK’S MYSTIC MESSAGE from The Divine Feminine: “Is Yours a Values-Driven Schedule?”

November 29, 2010 — Rosemary

Dear Ones,

It is time. Time for you to get serious about what really matters to you in your life.  Are you being consistent?  Do you say, for example, that family is important to you but do you spend all your time working?  Do you say that your personal growth is important but sports are taking up so much time that you have no time left to work on yourself?  Do you think that taking care of yourself is selfish and so you focus on giving to others until you are totally depleted and have nothing left to give, to others or to yourself?

There are so many ways that your life can reflect choices that do not seem to be consistent with what you believe to be your highest values.  We would tell you that time is speeding up, in ways you probably wouldn’t understand yet, but that you don’t have time to ‘play dumb’ with the time that you have.  In any given day your needs must be met in a shorter period of time than you used to have to focus on yourself.  There are many demands on your time and the days actually do seem to be getting shorter, not just in daylight hours in the Northern Hemisphere!  So let us tell you why it is so important that you take time for yourself, every day.

The Universe and Mother Earth agreed that you were needed on Planet Earth at this very moment.  You agreed to incarnate, under the conditions you chose, to fulfill a mission on Earth during your lifetime.  You agreed with other beings that you would all be on Earth together and that you would assist each other in fulfilling those missions by being the person you agreed to be.

NOW is the moment.  TODAY is the day.  Do you feel that you are being the person you incarnated to be?

When you are focused on urgent and important activities you might allow yourself to get distracted from what really matters to your Inner Being.  Are you so busy that you are not being ‘you’?  Are you so distracted that you are feeling disconnected from your purpose?  These are the signals that you must take control of your choices on a daily basis and line up your energy with your values.

Have you ever examined your values?  Not just what you think you should write on a list that someone else might read, but we are talking here about your deep, essential core values, the ones that drive your life.  Your unconscious mind is operating based on a structure of values that might not match that list you would show to another.  It is a good thing to periodically examine the list that your unconscious mind adheres to.  It is also a good thing to think about what you would like your values to be and to examine your daily expenditures of time to see if they coincide.

Many people slide through their days taking care of urgent things but never getting to the items that feel important to them.  Are you one of these people?

And what value structure are you using to decide what is important?  Is it truly your own or have you adopted someone else’s list without questioning if this is in consonance with your own values?  This is easy to do, especially when you are in relationship with another person or people.  But it is essential that you pause and study how you are spending your time.  Are you giving an amount of time to what really matters that matches its value to you?

Think about these things as you go through your day today.  Who decided what is important for you today?  And how much time do you have for what is really important to you?  Take time for yourself, for apportioning your time according to your values is a sign that you are living a Conscious Life.

And so it is.

________________________

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MUSE-INGS: What is your unconscious mind deciding for you?

August 31, 2010 — Rosemary

It seems as if we’re always being told to examine our thoughts, our beliefs.  That’s not as easy as it sounds.

I’ve worked with people who are literally shocked to discover some of the things that they believe.  Our unconscious minds are powerful helpers in our journey of personal growth, but with that power comes an ability to derail our best efforts, the decisions we make consciously but without the agreement of our unconscious minds.

Does this sound difficult to believe?  Let’s look at how powerful that unconscious mind can be.

You can breathe without thinking about it, right?  You don’t go around telling your heart to ‘Beat Now, and Now, and Now,’ do you?  Somewhere in your system is a controller taking care of all those systems so you don’t have to make a conscious decision to get your heart to beat or your lungs to expand.  So why shouldn’t that ‘controller’ be making other decisions for you?  Like how you will respond to a stimulus that is similar to what you experienced when you were 5 or 7 years old?  What about that knee-jerk reaction you had?  Did you consciously choose that or did it come from somewhere else?

Prejudice comes from training in our youth.  In the show, ‘South Pacific,’ they say that you must be carefully taught to hate.  But once those seeds of hatred are planted, you might not even know that you believe that someone ‘should be hated.’  Or what about those family stories that plant a seed about who you are supposed to be?  ‘Our family always does…….’ [fill in the blank].  There can be some powerful beliefs ingrained in us as children that we don’t even recognize are at work.

And so, as adults, we go along thinking that we are in charge when the truth is that our unconscious minds are holding onto beliefs and thoughts about ourselves and the world that might not be valid anymore.  The bogeyman under the bed might not actually be there but the little child within might still be afraid of a strange situation.

How do we use this information in our adult lives?  The first place to start is to examine what we believe.  In every situation, the question to ask is, ‘Is what I believe about this situation true?’  When we are responding to a particular stimulus, we can ask ourselves if the response is appropriate in this moment or is our unconscious mind adding on some data from previous experiences that might not apply right now.  This ability to ask questions of ourselves is the first step to living a conscious life.

And we must question what comes at us and to us from outside sources.  If you are told something that doesn’t feel right, pause and ask yourself what it is exactly that you are feeling.  What, within yourself, is not resonating with this information?  Or what IS resonating with this information, and can you believe something new or contrary to what you believed before?

These questions only help us if we have already started to examine ourselves.  Being on a path of personal growth invites us to become aware in every moment of our own thoughts and beliefs.  For some, this might require help at first, especially in clearing away blocks held in the unconscious mind and difficult to unearth for examination.  The good news is that the more you practice examining your thoughts and beliefs the easier it is to continue.  It rapidly becomes a way of life as your understanding deepens of the intricate relationship of your conscious and unconscious minds.

Personal growth is the path to bringing more Light into your life.  Embrace the journey.  Do the work.  Examine what you believe, both consciously and unconsciously, and grow.

________________________

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