It seems today as if there is always something to ‘Flip Out’ over! What has you feeling this way today?
I sometimes hear clients longing for simpler lives or less stress or at least less drama in their lives, but they are really wishing for something to change about their circumstances without a thought to how they can change themselves.
Flipping Out happens when we don’t have enough resources in our tool box to deal with what is happening in our environment. If you can reach into your Resource Tool Box and pull out just what you need to do in this circumstance, then you just do that and there’s no need to get too excited. But how often are you perfectly prepared for exactly what is going on?
Let me say here that I am not talking about going into denial and pretending that nothing big is happening! Sticking your fingers in your ear and singing, ‘La, la, la, la!’ won’t manage the stress of the circumstances, although, I admit, sometimes that seems like an attractive behavior choice. Denial invites the Universe to keep bringing the lesson to us, over and over again, with perhaps more severity each time until we learn what we are to learn.
What tools have you been developing to prepare you for whatever might come your way? Are you on a path of constant personal growth, seeking new skills, finding new opportunities to explore ideas? Are you committed to your own personal, spiritual growth as a journey of exploration? How you answer these questions will determine how well you can handle what happens around you.
Just as an athlete doesn’t wake up one morning and decide to win a gold medal in discus throwing without training for that exact sport, so, too, must you train for the circumstances that haven’t yet come into your life.
When the doctor says, ‘There’s something of concern going on here,’ or you get the phone call that, ‘There’s been an accident,’ how will you respond?
I pray that you never hear those words but it could be something else that throws you for a loop and the resources must already be available to you or you will find it more difficult to cope.
So what are you doing today, this week, this year to expand the tools in your Resource Tool Box? Are you taking a class? Working with a coach/counselor? Reading self-help books? In a group with speakers who teach you tools? Attending seminars and conferences with content-rich programs for personal growth?
This is not an activity that can be postponed indefinitely! Now is the time to prevent Flip Out!
Learning meditation can be a great start. Breathe, hit the pause button, take a moment to collect yourself. Allow thoughts to arise but to keep flowing onward, without attaching to the thoughts. Give yourself permission to focus on your breath and to let go of thoughts and emotions that come up for you. Give yourself permission to simply BE.
Sign up for a class on a psychological or spiritual topic that intrigues you. Read a book that someone has recommended to you. Find a group of explorers that you can join to study new ideas. Work with a coach who can help you to develop the tools that are best for you.
Fill up the Resource Tool Box and you’ll be ready if and when something happens. Won’t it be nice to have the confidence of knowing that, even if you never need to use the tools, you won’t have to resort to ‘Flipping Out’?
PS: Are you in the Annapolis, Maryland area this evening? Then it is not too late to register for my workshop on Spiritual Tools for 2012 and Beyond! But do hurry because it starts tonight, in person, at 7:00 pm Eastern. Come add to the fun evening! Register Here
Mystic Messages 
“Are You Flipping Out Over Something?” A Commentary by Richard
October 25, 2012 — RichardWe are adding a new feature to the Mystic Messages Blog with the change-over to my weekly MuseLetter which is replacing my Ezine. Now on Thursdays, in place of what I used to publish as Book Lights, my partner, Richard, is offering a commentary on my weekly Mystic Message and Inspiration.
From Richard—
I was particularly struck by the topic this week: Flip-Out. In fact I too often find myself flipping-out and almost always over very small things. Computers suddenly running slow, or even worse, crashing for unknown reasons; a lost item, like keys; a negative checking account balance when there should be plenty of cash available; a credit card that inexplicably fails to work (and this is worst if it’s a client’s charge that won’t go through!); the dog’s 2:00 am need…the list can be nearly endless! Are these life and death issues; of course not. But in our hustle-bustle lives they do add fuel to the fire of an already hot burn life-style that keeps pace with a 21st Century clock!
Is it a particularly male thing to flip-out over small things? Rosemary goes through life at a pretty calm clip; her life is just as complicated as mine. She writes and speaks this week about a “Toolbox of Resources.” Well, I’m a pretty resourceful guy; I’m on the journey with her. And yet my fuse is so much shorter. But I’m ready to learn these lessons; the 2×4 upside the head is beginning to hurt, get through to me!
I am examining my tools and resources. In the last few months I have rediscovered the Tao, the ancient Chinese philosophy known as The Way. I have read fairly extensively about Taoism, studied it as part of my seminary program, practiced off and on through authors such as Mantak Chia, studied and memorized sections of Lao-Tzu’s Taoteching, consulted the I Ching, and practiced Tai Chi. And recently I found an excellent Qigong instructor who has brought me back to this Way. And there are some significant tools and resources to be found here.
Managing my “flip-out moments” is certainly a skill I am working on. An emotion I frequently reach for in these moments is “anger” in its various forms. I can too easily flash to a white heat over some relatively small irritation. I cool quickly and then realize the exaggerated reaction as an unproductive response to the situation. And I ask myself, “why the unbalanced reaction?” And, “why the wasted energy?”
The Chinese Masters identify anger as one of the obstacles to finding The Way. In addition to wanting to reduce my expenditure of energy on a wasted emotion, I want to overcome this obstacle. And, oh by the way, mastering anger will go a long way toward improving my environment!
In the Taoist traditions negative emotions, like Anger, can be transmuted into their corresponding virtues; in the case of Anger the work is to transmute it to Creativity or Resourcefulness. Wow! What if my wasted anger energy can be channeled into creative energy? What a concept!
This is not as easy as it sounds, however. But in my mind it is clearly worth the effort; I choose creativity over anger, calm over flip-out, any day! Rosemary mentions meditation as an approach to “hit the pause button” in the midst of over-reaction (or better yet before the reaction even occurs!). Qigong is often referred to as “Meditation in Motion” and I am finding this practice is a way to pull my energy and my resources, my consciousness, into the present moment when I can be fully aware of my environment, my reaction at any given moment to the environment and to then respond appropriately. When I am very, very present I can actually catch myself on the verge of anger and quickly seek a creative response, diverting the anger into resourcefulness! I have a long way to go to catch myself every time, or even often! But it’s good work for the journey!
Guys, Rosemary has many ways to channel the flip-out mode into presence of mind. Her toolbox is filled with fun things and even some neat toys! Sometimes it may seem easier just to go with the reactive emotion of the moment; but too often the consequences of the easy route bite painfully.
Flip-out reaction or creative response? The choice is yours if you are willing to do the work!