MUSE-INGS: “Practice Making Conscious Choices!” by Rosemary Bredeson

December 7, 2010 — Rosemary

Choices.  Choices.  Choices.

Sometimes it feels as if we have too many choices and at other times that we have no choice.  It really does help to move up above a situation so that we can gain a bigger vantage point and see that there are always choices to make.  When we focus so narrowly on only one possible path, seeing only one possible choice, we limit ourselves and can feel powerless over our lives.

The first step in improving a situation like this is to pause and breathe.  Taking a deep breath actually moves our internal state into one that can see beyond the tiny perspective we have when we are holding our breath or breathing in a shallow manner.  So take a deep breath now to remind yourself how it feels.

Then allow yourself to metaphorically step back from the situation and look for the list of all possibilities, include those you might laugh at because they seem so outrageous.  Go ahead and laugh but put those outrageous possibilities on the list.  Then keep listing options until even the outrageous ones are exhausted.  This keeps you moving beyond feeling powerless and into a bigger energy.

How do you make a choice from among the list of possibilities?  Do you have a system that you have been using?  How is that working for you?  Do you feel confident in your choices?

For some people, the best choice is to delay making a choice.  Some people need time and space for decisions to percolate within them.  Others need to discuss the options because they process better by talking than by sitting alone and thinking about them.  Some might flip a coin or ask a trusted advisor.  What is your system?

If whatever you’ve tried in the past doesn’t give you great confidence in the decisions you make now, try a different system.  If you’ve relied on the past in working it out by yourself, why not try discussing a choice you have to make with someone else?  If you’re used to asking for advice, why don’t you try examining your choice from every angle by yourself first?  If you’ve never tried dowsing, why not get out a pendulum or consult oracle cards or try some other divination tool?

The point is to try a new approach to bring you into a consciousness about making choices in your life.  You are always at a point of choice if you allow yourself to see your life that way.  Learning to see your choices and to get in touch with your own empowered inner self leads you to become stronger in making those choices.

Find the Confident You by practicing your decision-making skills from a place of empowerment.  Notice how many choices you make in a day and then become conscious of every choice.  Are you ordering the same thing for lunch every day or can you make a different choice?  How about that Starbucks order – are you consciously choosing that latte or are you doing it out of habit?  What about the route you are driving – is it the one your intuition is leading you to drive or are you ignoring that inner signal to go a different way today?  Follow that inner guide.  Make each choice count today.

You will find that confidence depends on the skills you exercise in making choices, big and small.  Practice different skills to build your confidence.  Make conscious choices starting NOW!

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BOOK LIGHTS: “Success Starts with Attitude: 50 Ways to Refuel, Recharge and Reenergize Yourself in Business and Life” by James Malinchak

December 1, 2010 — Rosemary

“Watch Out for Negative People:

“As you begin pursuing certain goals, you may encounter people who will criticize and try to convince you that achieving certain goals in your life aren’t possible.  Stay away from these negative thinking people.  Those who tell you that it can’t be done are simply jealous or haven’t really achieved their goals.  Don’t worry about what others think about your ability to achieve a goal.  It only matters what you think and believe about yourself.”

from Success Starts with Attitude:
50 Ways to Refuel, Recharge and Reenergize Yourself in Business and Life
by James Malinchak

James is so right in this!  “It only matters what you think and believe about yourself.”  Too often we get so caught up in what others think about us, our abilities and what we should, according to them, be doing that we forget what really matters to us.  Focus on your own values and make sure they reflect YOU, not someone else!

Rosemary

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MUSE-INGS: Live Your Values Consciously! by Rosemary Bredeson

November 30, 2010 — Rosemary

It feels as if we are frequently being asked to ask ourselves, “What really matters?”  We get all worked up about something that bothers or frustrates or upsets us.  But if we pause and ask, “What really matters in this situation?” would we get so worked up?

It really does seem as if time is speeding up and that the days no longer have the full 24 hours available to us.  Does it seem that way to you, too?  Whether it’s the Photon Belt or the Earth’s rotation on its axis or some other reason, the FEELING that time is speeding up can lead us to making some decisions about  how to spend the time that we do have.

I know there are many days that I wake up with an expectation of what my to-do list looks like but I seem to get caught up in the drama of the day and often get pulled off that list to take care of someone else’s drama.  I’m sure that has happened to you, too, hasn’t it?  So how do we take back control of our own time?

The first step is to decide what our own values are.  Not what we wish they were or what we think they should be, but what we truly believe our values are, deep in our heart.  I learned some good exercises when I trained in NLP [Neuro-Linguistic Programming] that help to identify the values that our unconscious minds hold and they are often not what we ‘think’ our values are.  How can this be?  Our conscious minds use logic not emotion when coming up with a list of values but our unconscious minds develop the list from our emotional beliefs and understandings, of ourselves and of our lives.  The unconscious mind is focused on surviving the day, based on whatever it believes about our safety and security.  While one’s conscious mind might think that eating healthy foods is a high value, the unconscious mind might be remembering a time when food was scarce and created a desire to eat everything in sight in case there’s no more food to eat later.  One’s conscious mind might think that being with friends is the most important thing to do today while the unconscious mind might be craving some alone time.  The body might respond to this values conflict by creating illness so that the alone time takes precedence over the friend time.

Do you see how this works?  Have you ever experienced this seeming contradiction?  What do you do about it?

Well, as in most things, when living a Conscious Life, the first thing to do is to hit the ‘pause button’ and really look at how time is being spent.  Again, not in how you wish it were but in how it is realistically being devoted to activities.  Keep a time diary, in 15 minute increments, for a few days.  No judgments here, just record, from a curious, non-judgmental and accepting viewpoint.  Do you need more alone time? You might see you are pulling out of social engagements, always having a good reason but maybe it is because you have said ‘yes’ to something that your unconscious mind wanted you to say ‘no’ to.  Are you avoiding being with someone that you think you like but that you seem to have lots of reasons to avoid?  Maybe that person really doesn’t resonate with you but you haven’t yet figured out how to shift things so that you don’t have to spend time with them.

The list can go on and on, but the important thing to realize is that, conscious or unconscious, your values, what really matters to you, is driving your life at some level.  Even if you frequently make choices that contradict the values of your unconscious mind, you will start to find the debilitating nature of illness or accident or drama pointing the way for you to find answers about what you truly value in your life.

Doesn’t it make sense to do the personal growth work so that you can become conscious about your values and the choices that you are making?  Make a commitment to start this work today!

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MUSE-INGS: It’s always about the energy! by Rosemary Bredeson

November 23, 2010 — Rosemary

People seem to be growing more sensitive to energies and noticing the energy of a group can really be a protective measure.  I’ve noticed that some groups seem to shift energies from comfortable to dynamic to uncomfortable [for me] and sometimes it’s hard to pinpoint what is happening. Groups of 3 people can have a dynamic based on who wields more power in that trio while huge groups of 200 can have an amorphous energy that feels benign in the large group but contains many subgroups that have their own dynamic.  Have you seen this in the groups in which you participate?

When you are sensitive to the energies around you, you might find yourself gravitating toward those people and groups whose energy patterns are compatible with yours.  You might also find yourself moving away from groups, even those you have been a part of for a long time, when the energy feels as if it has shifted and no longer supports you or your personal growth. This is happening for a lot of people with churches and organizations that, at one time, served them but no longer do so.

People grow.  At least, Conscious People grow.  For those who are pursuing a life of evolutionary consciousness, many groups complete their purpose in a person’s life and that person must make a choice about whether to continue to associate with the group or to move on.  This does not always have to be painful or difficult or done in anger or sadness. This is just the path of an evolutionary person.  Just as you do not stay in grade school for your whole life, some associations complete their usefulness for your personal growth and you ‘graduate’ from them. The graceful way to leave these groups is to bless them on their own way while accepting that your path parts from theirs on the journey.

Have you ever seen someone stay a part of a group only to criticize and complain about that group? Doesn’t that make you wonder why they stay a member?  And what about families that get together for a holiday celebration but the individuals can’t wait for the so-called ‘celebration’ to be over so they can go to be with their friends?  At times, a group or even a family no longer supports one on one’s journey.  It might take a lot of energy to move out of a familiar group or to decide to spend less time with a family that makes one feel uncomfortable.  One alternative to leaving is to see if the group is willing to shift its energy into a space that feels more comfortable to the person considering leaving.

This can be a tall order but it can have dramatic results.  In some cases, just pointing out that old patterns have jumped up again and that perhaps they don’t belong in the 21st Century gathering can cause people to reconsider their behaviors.  Sometimes you can simply ask to be treated differently.  I’ve seen this work with people who tease and joke to the point of causing emotional pain to another but, when requested, stop acting that way.  It might be helpful to think ahead to a gathering where you anticipate feeling uncomfortable and ask yourself how you wish it were different.  Energize that different picture of the gathering, and believe that you can ask others to participate in the new vision.

And even if others don’t want to change the situation, it might be that gaining a perspective on what is going on helps YOU to change how you feel about the situation. Understanding the energy of a group and how it depends on the energy that you bring to it can give you new insights into your participation in that group.  Decide that you can shift or they can shift or you can drift away.

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MUSE-INGS: “Be the Change” by Rosemary Bredeson

November 16, 2010 — Rosemary

I wonder if the recent earthquakes and volcano eruptions are symbolic of the changes we can be expecting among human societies soon?  I, for one, hope to learn to grow and change without cataclysm!

But how many of us are really open to change?  Do we embrace it or do we run from it?

I believe that change is a good thing when it derives from expanded awareness, more intellectual examination of an idea, a consciousness that has evolved.  But the kind of change that follows a rush into fear or a determination to shut down a part of the self, especially if that part is the intellectual, thinking part, is a kind of change that does not advance humanity in its consciousness evolution.  When we are in a state of fear we have fewer resources with which to work than when we are in a more relaxed state of awareness.  And when we choose to stay in fear we give away our power to those who would take it from us.

This is the dynamic that bullies bank their efforts on.  Make us fearful and they can take what they want from us.  Big bullies on big playing stages can convince us to give up a great deal of our personal power if they can make us fearful enough.  The only way to counteract this energy is to stay in our own power, refuse to cower in fear, and retain a connection to our thinking self.

Have you ever seen someone in fear who seems to lose their intellectual abilities and be able only to focus on that which they fear?  I watched our dog, Tara, play with a mouse today and the mouse finally stayed cornered and shivering, essentially giving up in fear, when I blocked its path.  [Unfortunately, Tara was still in the corner the mouse had left, still trying to dig it out – hadn’t noticed the mouse was gone.  Obviously we need to get a cat!]  But the mouse probably could have gotten away if it hadn’t been intimidated by a small Lhasa Apso and a large human being.

We sometimes do the same thing that mouse did – stand in a corner, shivering and cowering in fear – when if we stepped up and figured out a solution we could get ourselves out of that corner.  This mouse scurried right by the dog who was continuing to dig for it in the other corner of the room.  Maybe all we need to do is to face our fears and then get in touch with our inner power to overcome those fears.

No one can take away your inner power unless you give it to them.  Remember that your strength does not derive from a gift from others.  Your strength resides in you and all you need to do is to remember that it is there.  When changes come, look inside yourself to see how you can best benefit from those changes.  Do not be in fear of change.  Use the energy of change to become more empowered.  You can change that which no longer serves you and strengthen your resolve in those areas that you do not wish to change.

You can decide what to do with change energy.  Decide to expand your awareness and advance the evolution of human consciousness.  Join the group or groups that support you in this.

As Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

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MUSE-INGS: Give Yourself the “All-Clear” Signal by Rosemary Bredeson

November 9, 2010 — Rosemary

It is so important to remember to breathe when we feel distressed!  And certainly being surrounded by stress, strife, discord, anger and hatred will make us feel distressed!

What do you do when you feel the atmosphere around you becoming charged with energy that doesn’t resonate with you?  Do you try to fight back? Do you remove yourself from the situation?  Do you try to change the situation in some other way?

For most of us, the desire arises to make a change in a charged situation, but you must start to examine what you are trying to accomplish.  For some people, their desired outcome is to achieve harmony, keep the peace, end the discord because it feels so uncomfortable when the energy is that discordant.  For others, they want to jump into the discord and ‘duke it out’ until things are resolved, loving the fight as much as they love to win.  And some people choose to remove themselves, allowing the situation to resolve or not independently of their participation.  Do you know your own style when you are feeling that a situation around you has grown uncomfortable?

We must all become more aware of the energies around us.  We feel them but we do not always take the time to identify and classify what we are feeling.  Energy is just energy.  It is not inherently negative or positive, good or bad.  We can, however, judge it compatible or incompatible with our own energy field.  And how much work are you willing to do to clear your own energy field of all the energy that is not compatible with you?

Here is the work for today’s human being – clear the energies.  Clear your own field first, clear your environment, work to clear the Earth of energies that do not sustain her.  If you do not know how to clear energy, then learn, for this skill is needed immediately to keep you healthy and moving forward in your development.  I’ve worked with many clients who simply need to have someone else’s energy attachments removed from their energy field in order that they might feel stronger and clearer.  Carrying around someone else’s energy, especially if it is severely discordant with your own, can drain you and eventually even make you sick.  Removing the influence of that incompatible energy can have an amazing effect on how you feel.

And I’ve worked with clients where, as soon as we did this clearing work, other people could sense that something had happened.  This is not to judge others, for energy cords are usually unconscious attachments, but this clearing can be powerful for both parties because each person is holding only their own energy afterward.

When you get caught up in discordant energies around – for example, when people are fighting or there is a backbiting situation at work – then it becomes difficult for you to be in your own energetic space, clear about the vibrations that are compatible with you.  Do what it takes to clear your own energy field.  Allow in only that which is compatible with the energetic level that you wish to experience.  You CAN be in charge of your own energy field if you are just conscious about it!

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BOOK LIGHTS: from The Secret Code on your Hands: “An Illustrated Guide to Palmistry” by Vernon Mahabal

November 3, 2010 — Rosemary

“Think of the hand as a road map of your life.  When walking around in a city, or enjoying a museum, a map is a very important item.  It lets us know where we are, what we will be able to see, and the fastest way to other places.  The map of our hands lets us know our own individual talents and abilities.  If we learn to read our map, life will become easier for us.  When we understand what we are naturally good at, we will become very strong and confident.”

from The Secret Code on your Hands:
An Illustrated Guide to Palmistry
by Vernon Mahabal

Do you wish you had a ‘roadmap’ to your own empowerment?  This is what I love to see when I work with people, an understanding of their talents and a belief in their own abilities.  But most importantly, people who are exploring the ‘why am I here?’ question, no matter what tool they use, have a confidence in themselves that allows them to move forward, to progress, to grow.  This growth benefits all of humanity.  The first step is to become free of the limiting beliefs and negative thoughts that hold us back from our own greatness!

Rosemary

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MUSE-INGS: Decide to Believe or Not – It’s up to You by Rosemary Bredeson

November 2, 2010 — Rosemary

How many times do we have to hear that we create our own reality with our thoughts and beliefs?  Isn’t this message getting a bit tired?

Unfortunately, we must continue to hear this over and over again because there is always another level to the work we must do to gain control over our thoughts.

Have you been working with this concept for a while?  I have.  I learned many years ago that the mind/body connection is very strong.  I had no idea that this was so until I examined some ways in which my mind was controlling my body – in an unconscious way – to my detriment.  I fixed that problem and became a believer in the power of the mind.

There are many books out there that talk about the power of the mind, e.g., Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, a classic.  But the place where we must really begin is to understand that we CHOOSE whether or not to attach our energy to a passing thought.  Sometimes it’s easier to feel that what we think is the result of what is going on in our little world but the truth is that the cycle begins with our thoughts, beliefs and expectations.  We human are learning beings and we are constantly seeking opportunities to learn our lessons.  Whatever we are thinking is bringing the next lesson to us.  If we allow ourselves to attach to negative thoughts we stay stuck and often miss an opportunity to learn a lesson while we stay in the ‘woe is me’ energy.  People who lead fulfilling lives have learned that ‘woe is me’ energy does not propel them forward in their personal growth nor do the problems get solved with that energy.

Now I am not saying that a reaction to a particular situation might not come up as ‘woe is me’ but it is attaching to that thought, staying with that energy, that can paralyze us and keep us from forward progress.  What to do instead?  Recognize how powerful we are and catch the moment before we attach to that thought.  Think instead, ‘I am feeling put-upon and disturbed but I know that I have resources I can tap into to find a solution, or set of solutions, to this problem.’  Keep focused on moving energy THROUGH a situation rather than attaching and getting stuck IN a situation.

The beliefs of generations before us are instilled in us as if they are the Truth with a capital ‘T’ about the world around us and these can be trickier to dislodge because we have to unearth them as influential energies.  We don’t spend much time analyzing why gravity works but we believe that if we drop something it will fall to the ground.  Generational beliefs operate much as gravity does in our lives, but we must learn to analyze the source of those beliefs and choose to embrace or discard them from a conscious position.  Sometimes this requires the assistance of a counselor who can ferret out with us/for us where these beliefs are functioning in our lives.  The effect can be insidious but, once identified, can be dealt with very efficiently.

Understand your role in your reality.  Think empowering thoughts.  Work to clear limiting beliefs.  Identify the source of what you believe and make a conscious choice whether to continue believing that.  THEN you will be living a Conscious Life and your reality will coincide with what you desire it to be!

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BOOK LIGHTS: from “The Rhythm of Compassion, Caring for Self, Connecting with Society” by Gail Straub

October 27, 2010 — Rosemary

“In his book, Time and Soul, Jacob Needleman says ‘The time famine of our lives and our culture is in fact a symptom of metaphysical starvation.’  Many of us in America live abundant lives.  Yet we are like the knight Parsifal standing before the Grail Castle, seeing the most beautiful court in the world, and forgetting to ask the most important question: Whom does the Grail serve?  In modern terms we have to ask: In all this abundance, what matters most?  How am I spending my time?  Am I using it compassionately and creatively?  What goals does my spirit serve?”

from The Rhythm of Compassion, Caring for Self, Connecting with Society
by Gail Straub

We are all so busy that we forget to ask ‘What matters most?’  The Dalai Lama says that we are here to be happy but that being happy is an art.  Once you decide what matters most to you, and you focus your attention and time on that, you will be happy.  Remember, don’t sweat the small stuff!

Rosemary

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MUSE-INGS: Smile and the World Smiles with You

October 26, 2010 — Rosemary

Seems we’re always getting messages about being happy.  Why are so many people feeling unhappy if it’s just a decision that we make?

Maybe the word ‘just’ holds the clue in the sentence above.

Making a decision to be happy seems counter-intuitive to what our society tries to make us believe.  Think of advertising.  ‘We’ll be happy if we just _________’ – fill in this blank with the product being advertised.  Or we convince ourselves that there’s just one more thing to acquire, one more person we need in our life, one more achievement we must accomplish, and THEN we’ll be happy.  This keeps ‘happy’ just outside our reach, because there’s always one more product, perfect person or achievement before we can REALLY feel happy.

What if we all, collectively, made a decision that we are going to feel happy RIGHT NOW, in THIS moment, with whatever we have, whoever is in our life, and whatever we’ve done so far?  Think about the energy involved in making that collective decision!  Imagine if we all looked around at each other and smiled from that place of a decision to be happy!  Wouldn’t that be a great feeling?

OK, so this sounds impossible, but is it, really?  I think about what it felt like when almost 200 people created a healing chi field of energy in Colorado Springs and then listened to the qigong master telling us to ‘feel the inner smile.’  We were only standing in a hotel ballroom with our eyes closed, but happiness was there in that moment.  And it felt good!

Maybe it is too much to expect that every single moment will feel like a happy moment but every time we become conscious of the present moment we can feel happy about something in that moment.  I remember my parents standing in the middle of Wilmett Road watching our burning house.  It seemed like such a huge tragedy, and I was thinking of my melting prom dress in my bedroom.  But Mom & Dad laughed about how the neighbors were bringing him martinis and her iced tea!  They kept saying, ‘Everything will be okay.  Things always work out for the best.’   How could anyone look at a burning house and find anything to laugh about?  Yet my parents laughed about iced tea and martinis!

There is always something around to make you smile.  If you are willing to open your eyes until you find it, you can have a glimmer of a smile form on your face.  Then share that smile.

One surefire way to feel happy is to help someone else.  When you move your focus from what’s wrong with/miserable in your own life and instead focus on helping someone else, you distance yourself from the energy of lack and want and connect yourself with the energy of giving.  There is a higher vibration in the energy of giving to others and this will ‘feel’ better.

The Law of Attraction says that we attract what we focus our attention and our thoughts on.  It’s pretty clear that if you are focusing on what you lack, what is not working in your life, then that’s the energy that you are sending out into the Universe.  When you shift your thoughts and attention to what makes you feel happy, you will attract more of that into your life.  It’s really very simple, even if it is not so easy.

So make a decision today to send out the energy of happiness.  Share your smiles.  Every time you catch yourself thinking about what makes you unhappy, shift your focus.  Even if you have to smile first and shift your thoughts afterward, it’s worth a try, isn’t it?

I’ll hold the intention that you will have happiness inside you today so that you can smile as you read this!  Happy smiles to you!

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Please feel free to re-post this article and share it with your readers. All I ask is that you include the following information when you do:

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