ROSEMARY’S THROWBACK THURSDAY VIDEO: Examine Your Expectations

This video is from the Spring, 2013 about expectations. It corresponds well with the messages for this week on plans and planning. The phrase “this or something better” applies to both plans and expectations!

Enjoy this replay:

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How’s That Planning Thing Going for You? – Richard’s Commentary

We are on the last leg of our journey to the south, visiting family and friends all the way from Maryland to the “main event” in Orlando, Florida and back again. Today we are leaving Raleigh, North Carolina where we have spent some time with second son’s family, to head home and plunge right back into our “normal” lives. In fact we arrive just in time to lead our Consciousness Exploration Group scheduled for the first Wednesday of every month.

It has been a “busy” trip with one-night stands in several places as we drove south. Planning and coordination was key to keep us relatively on track to get from place to place. The trip has gone really well. And I expect our last leg will go well.

We did get a little tangled up in navigating between Orlando and the Amrit Yoga Ashram, where we spent a delightful time with our nephew. Our Google Maps were not in complete agreement with our GPS guidance and we made some wrong turns on the toll roads. We spent a couple extra dollars backtracking, and, yes, my reaction was anger and frustration. I failed to take the advice Rosemary offered in her Exploration post:

Event happens.  Then you React.  And then you CHOOSE how you will respond.

Event (Plan seems to go awry).  What is your REACTION?  Anger?  Upset? Depression? Denial? So many different emotions can arise and they can stem from previous experiences, even from your childhood.  Reactions start at the unconscious level. But your RESPONSE is chosen consciously.

The key here is choice. The initial reaction is OK; we all react to missteps, to little, and big mistakes, to detours in life that annoy. It is the next step that matters. It is the conscious pause to move into our higher brain and consider an appropriate response, choose that response and act.

The second key is to work on shortening the time from reaction to chosen appropriate response. This seems to be the main work of my lifetime. My primary lesson is patience; and I get many opportunities to practice! Highway detours are just an example.

We will likely need to change our plans for visiting our new grandson in California. We had planned to go out for second son’s birthday, a few weeks after planned birth of Tristan. Son’s plans went into a sharp detour when Tristan decided to come into the world three and a half weeks early! Sometimes other people’s choices affect our plans!

Son Andrew seems to have handled this big change in his plans relatively well. He and Mom are home now and Tristan will follow soon when he is eating well and gaining a bit of weight (he was four and a half pounds at birth).

Of course we are easy with this change in plans; it means we get to see him that much sooner! We have to rearrange some scheduled events and reschedule the trip; fortunately we had not yet made flight reservations.

Some detours are good, even wonderful. This is what Rosemary means by “this or something better.” The best plans include this line!

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ROSEMARY’S INSPIRATION: Big News: Tristan Wallace Bredeson is on the Planet!

My “Two-Minute” Video for this Week: Big News: Tristan Wallace Bredeson is on the Planet!

ROSEMARY’S EXPLORATION: How’s That Planning Thing Going for You?

We can plan.  We can organize.  We can expect.  And then Life Happens.

Have you ever had a plan, had everything organized down to the tiniest detail, and set your expectations on that plan working out exactly as you planned it?  And have you had the experience of having little or big glitches shift things out of Plan A?

We have all had this experience.  We THINK we are in charge of everything but the Universe sometimes (or often) has a different plan and guess who succeeds?

This isn’t about whether or not you should develop a plan of action to accomplish something.  It’s good to have a plan.  But do you become so invested in YOUR plan that you forget the ‘this or something better’ part of your request to the Universe?  There is a value in learning to go with the flow.

We saw this with the birth of our grandson.  His parents had Plan A, Plan B, Plan C and the baby decided to be born on HIS schedule, the way HE wanted to come into the world, with HIS CHOSEN astrological birth chart.  He was born the day that a surprise baby shower had been planned for his Mommy.  The surprise was his appearance in the world 3 ½ weeks early!

What plans have you developed that have seemed to go awry?  How do you react when that happens?

Remember that the formula is:

Event happens.  Then you React.  And then you CHOOSE how you will respond.

Event (Plan seems to go awry).  What is your REACTION?  Anger?  Upset? Depression? Denial? So many different emotions can arise and they can stem from previous experiences, even from your childhood.  Reactions start at the unconscious level. But your RESPONSE is chosen consciously.

Do you allow your reaction to dictate your response?  Or do you hit the pause button and give yourself a chance to consciously choose how you will respond?  This is how you live a conscious life.

Babies choose how and when they will come into the world.  Most of us accept that they have a plan of their own.  But what about other plans that don’t go the way you want them to, or planned them, or expected?  What if another person interferes with your plans?  What do you do then?

Remember that you CHOOSE how to respond.  You can choose to get upset and to stay upset but that isn’t a very resourceful place to be.  Even if you do get upset, you can decide to respond by figuring out a new plan, to go with the flow.

Do you plan differently in your work than at home?  Are you flexible in the workplace to get along with others but you are rigid at home because you want things to be just the way you intend for them to be?  Notice if you operate differently and then ask yourself, ‘Why?’  Sometimes it is easier to adjust plans in the workplace because you are not emotionally invested in them and you are resourceful when you are in ‘work mode.’ But when you are at home, with the family or in a social setting, you might have stronger expectations that you have control over your life.  Can you go with the flow?  Are you willing to work on Plan B or Plan C?

If you are the opposite – going with the flow outside of work but expecting everyone around you at work to line up with your plan – what could you gain by adding some flexibility to your methods?  What if Plan A was the goal but Plan B was also OK?

Think about this the next time you decide that your plans must go exactly as you arranged them.  Those creative babies might have a mind of their own!

This or something better.