How easy it is to focus our attention on the things that need to be fixed or on the painful things that we wish were different! We can get so caught up in wishing something would change that we forget how powerful we are to change how we think about a situation.
My wonderful Mom, Gloria Robertson, always saw silver linings. One of her favorite sayings was, ‘Everything always works out for the best.’ And the other thing she said often was,
‘As a rule, Man’s a fool,
When it’s hot he wants it cool.
When it’s cool he wants it hot,
Always wishing what is not.’
My Mom was a very wise woman. We spend so much time wishing things were different when really the only thing we need to change is how we think about things. I remember my Mom, towards the end of her life, deciding that she would only worry about those things that it was in her power to make different. She had an appointment with her doctor who asked her what had changed because her health had improved. She said, ‘I’ve adopted a new attitude – NMP.’ When he asked what ‘NMP’ stood for, she answered, ‘Not My Problem.’
It is very freeing to look around and decide what is ours to work on and what is beyond our control or what belongs to someone else to handle. And it is very empowering to take charge of those things that ARE our own to deal with. Not everything around us requires that we take charge of it. Not everything is ours to handle or to fix. Sometimes another person needs to learn to help himself or herself. Sometimes someone else needs to learn a lesson by handling something their own way. Sometimes ‘good enough’ is okay – it doesn’t always have to be perfect. Sometimes another person just wants to be left alone and it needs to be okay with us to allow that. And sometimes another person needs company and we need to be beyond ourselves enough to see that and to offer the company without judgment.
Look around you today and see if there isn’t some joy to be found in every conscious moment. What can you do to make yourself smile? Is there someone you can help? Is there some situation that you can laugh at? Can you laugh at yourself or do you always take yourself terribly seriously? Is there an animal to watch? A flower to notice? Music to enjoy? What can you feel gratitude about in this moment now?
Adopting the attitude that there is always some joy to be found will bring happiness into your life. And if you are truly struggling to find something about which to feel good, then get out your sense of humor and remember a time when you laughed and laughed at something you thought was hilariously funny. All you need to do is remember and you will be smiling again.
Keep a stock of funny movies or joke books or funny emails that you’ve received and get them out when you truly cannot find anything to give you joy. One joke, one laugh, is all it takes to shift your energy. One look out the window and you will find something to delight in, no matter how small it might seem. Remember, that if you spend all of your energy thinking about what you don’t want, the Universe won’t know what to bring you from the list of what you DO want. Energize the aspects of this moment that you want to magnify in your life. Experience delight and you will have more delight. Focus on joy and you will have more joy in your life. That’s how things work!
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Mystic Messages 
MUSE-INGS: Choose your focus – and laugh?
August 3, 2010 — RosemaryFocus on the beauty? Not so easy to do when things are looking bleak or when our attention takes us down a rabbit-hole into the space where everything is ugly.
But have you ever noticed how, when you DO focus on something besides ugliness, you can actually feel uplifted? Have you ever been really down and had a little child come up and give you a hug? There is true beauty in that hug, even if it’s full of mud or comes with a bouquet of weeds. Or have you been feeling sorry for yourself, feeling lonely, and had a friend call out of the blue and invite you out?
We really can control our thoughts when we become aware of our power over them. We all have knee-jerk reactions to situations or problems or even joy. Becoming Aware [with a capital ‘A’] means learning to assess those knee-jerk reactions and making a conscious decision about how to act next. A thought does not have to hold us in its grip without letting go if we choose not to allow it.
Sometimes thoughts do come unbidden into our consciousness but the important thing to learn is to process the thought and ask:
What is this?
Is this true for me now?
Is it in my highest good to hold onto this thought at this time?
Unbidden thoughts often stem from our insecurities and they masquerade as the reality of the moment but we must ask ourselves if they are actually true in that moment. We can worry all we want about the next tornado or earthquake or hurricane but if the sun is shining now isn’t that what is real? Isn’t that where we can find the beauty? We can always worry about something that might happen but if it is not true in this moment then there is something else to look at, to think about, something else on which to focus our attention.
Look around you today and see if you are focusing on the thoughts that are uplifting or if you are attaching to those thoughts that bring you down, that distract you from the beauty of the day. Even if you are wrestling with a problem today, can you find something of beauty to think of for a moment? Scientists are now saying that smiling can make us feel happy – it’s not just the other way around! Try looking in the mirror when you are focusing on problems and force yourself to smile. I guarantee that you will either laugh at the way you look when you are worrying and/or laugh at the way you look when you force a smile. That single laugh will shift your body’s energy and allow the Light to come through in that moment.
That is an important shift, for allowing the Light to shine also brings with it resources that better equip you to find a solution to your problem. You are more resourceful with the Light in you than when you shroud yourself in darkness.
So go ahead and let your thoughts drift across the sky of your mind while you choose which ones on which to focus your attention. And if you need help, remember to look in the mirror and laugh a beautiful laugh!
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Please feel free to re-post this article and share it with your readers. All I ask is that you include the following information when you do: