This throwback video is only back to July 13. Here is a clip of Rosemary’s Oracle Speaks Event when she channeled The Divine Feminine. This is a short, but complete piece of the message on how best to set boundaries. Enjoy!
PS: The entire recording, video or audio, of The Oracle Speaks Event is available on my website:
Everyone around you has a story and you have only heard the part of the story that they want you to hear. Everyone has a part of themselves that is hidden away, being protected, staying safe by not being revealed. Behavior is not the story. Behavior is often the cover-up for the story.
When you understand this about the people around you it is easier to be gentle with those folks. What if that person just lost a loved one and doesn’t feel comfortable sharing that with you? What if that person was so horribly abused as a child that they cannot bear to be hugged by anyone because it re-traumatizes them? What if that person just got off the phone from a very disturbing conversation and they are in the middle of processing the information when you try to talk to them?
There is an endless list of possibilities for what is going on in another person’s life and most items on that list have nothing to do with you. Do you keep this in mind when you interact with other people? Can you be sympathetic to the part of the story that they are protecting from exposure and give them the benefit of the doubt?
Each of us has a responsibility to ourselves and to others to learn how to live in community with the people around us. We are not private islands with ‘No Trespassing’ signs on our foreheads! The most important lesson to learn about living in a civilized society is to learn what healthy boundaries are. Learn what to let in and what belongs to the other person.
Asking others to respect your boundaries includes allowing them to ask the same of you. Some people have very private stories behind the fence of their boundary and that is theirs to protect. By the same token, you are allowed to hold parts of yourself private from public scrutiny and anyone who doesn’t respect that boundary does not get the privilege of interacting with you.
In learning how to interact with others in a healthy way it is important that you know your own story. What motivates you? What has happened in your past that is influencing your present? What parts of you have you disowned that are lurking in your shadow bag waiting to be rediscovered and reintegrated? With whom have you had an interaction that might influence your current relationships with baggage from the past connection?
Study your story. Write it out. Do a timeline of your own life. It can be useful to do a timeline of your parents’ lives as you know them, or as they can share with you, and compare that with your own. Sometimes we can uncover hidden beliefs about ourselves by noticing what has moved onto our timeline from our parents.
Notice when you get stuck in your story instead of continuing to create it. Are you in a loop that has you repeating a part of your past story that is holding you back from growing in the present? Are you re-traumatizing yourself by repeating that story over and over again and never giving yourself a chance to open to new possibilities that allow you to release that old story?
What parts of your story are you hoping no one else will discover? Why?
Part of being on the path of personal growth is expanding your consciousness to encompass ALL of who you are. Every part of your story is important in shaping you to be the person that you are today. And this is true for everyone around you.
Own your story but do not be governed by it. Be conscious of your responsibility to continue to grow. Help others to grow by allowing them to have their own stories while keeping healthy boundaries for yourself.
And you can change your story! There are many techniques available to help you to do this. Empower yourself by taking the first step – write your story. Then the work can begin.
PS: Spring Book Special: Get Your Woman On! Embracing Beauty, Grace and the Power of Women – The Amazon Best Selling book that I co-authored with some amazing women – is available this month at a very special price – $12 with free shipping in the US and some great bonuses! This would be an inspirational gift for Mother’s Day for a woman who would like to read 39 stories of transformation. Here’s how to get your copy: Book Sale
PS: Did you know you can get these video messages and my commentary directly by email every Friday? When you subscribe I also include a GIFT as a thank you for joining my list: a professionally recorded 7-minute audio recording to help you relax and de-stress. Subscribe Here
Mystic Messages 
I Am Tolerating WHAT???!!! – Richard’s Commentary
September 12, 2013 — RichardTolerance, a “permissive attitude”, can be a lackadaisical approach to life or it can be a philosophy and intentional approach to life. Which is it? Maybe it can be both.
Tolerance in a carefully machined automobile part is the amount of deviation from a standard that can be allowed for the part to function properly. In this example machining the part further to comply with a tighter than needed tolerance would take more time and energy and would not necessarily improve the functionality of the part. A more relaxed tolerance in this case can save energy rather than expend more energy.
Personally I can tolerate a certain amount of dust on a windowsill or a few dust bunnies under the bed; if I vacuum the rug every two weeks rather than every week I am saving myself time and a bit on the electric bill. The tolerance level here is the amount of deviation from perfection that balances the energy saved with the energy expended on accepting the deviation.
If you are a parent, how much do you tolerate from your kids? Do you have a “permissive attitude” toward their behavior? And how far do you allow that permission to extend? Again, energy can be a measure here: the energy you spend on parenting can be balanced by the energy the children spend on testing the boundaries of your tolerance. They are busy learning about those boundaries and you must be busy setting them so they learn how to be balanced, creative, socially adapted individuals.
And then there are the personal boundaries that we develop and evolve as we grow and mature, learn and expand consciously. These boundaries form the tolerances in our lives. Some are external; they involve our family, friends, community, even country. Some people choose to leave their country of origin because they can no longer tolerate the living circumstances, whether those are political, religious, social, or economic factors. And then there are the internal boundaries, the tolerance levels we set up as standards for our own behavior and how we live life within those standards, or values. It is these values around which we balance the energy we expend on maintaining our adherence to those standards versus the energy drain from letting down our guard and giving in to a lower standard.
As an example one of my standards, a practice, is to write three longhand pages of text everyday, early in the day, preferably first thing in the morning. This is a practice I adopted from The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. I have been doing this for years, and I find it very worthwhile. It is a way for me to meditate, to journal, to dump the cobwebs from my psyche, to rail at the Universe, to give thanks to the universe, to channel the divine. I love this practice. Do I do it every day, first thing in the morning? No. Clearly there are things that get in the way, that disrupt this practice. This morning I am writing this blog post first before my pages. Lately I’ve been eating some breakfast before my pages. These are tolerances that I can live with; energy spent obsessing about always writing the pages first is not balanced by the positive effect of the writing. On the other hand there are some days I miss writing altogether. When I occasionally miss one day it seems to be OK, I can tolerate that. But when two or more days go by and I fail to get to my pages, I begin to notice the effects: I get more irritable, less tolerant! Then the balance tips in the direction of energy drained from me that is out of balance with energy spent in writing the pages.
How do you measure your tolerance levels? Do you do this consciously? Are you aware when your boundaries are crossed and your energy drained? It’s good to think about your boundaries so you can maximize your energy levels and live fully, in the present.
Now I’m going to write those pages!