“Most people want to be loved. They want to be appreciated, and they want to be understood. But the trouble with those desires is that you cannot control whether someone else appreciates or loves or understands.”
Esther and Jerry Hicks [The Teachings of Abraham™]
You CAN, however, appreciate or love or understand when you reach out to others. Remember that you attract that which you put out into the Universe. So if you want a relationship where the other person is seeing you as you wish to be seen, then you must first make the effort to see them through a clear lens that allows them to be who they are. Your efforts will improve all your relationships.